Disgrace

by

J. M. Coetzee

Disgrace: Chapter 18 Summary & Analysis

Summary
Analysis
Unexpectedly, David receives a call from a detective claiming to have found his car, but when he goes to identify it, it’s not really his. The police also tell him they arrested two men in connection with this car, but that they’ve already been released on bail. On the ride home, David talks to Lucy once more about how important it is that she face what happened to her, encouraging her to move out of the farmhouse, which he says is “full of ugly memories.” And though she says she can’t bring herself to talk about the matter, she eventually says, “It was so personal. It was done with such personal hatred.” She then admits that she’s afraid on the farm, but she maintains that she can’t leave yet. “Whatever I decide I want to decide by myself, without being pushed,” she says.
Disgrace is a complex book because Coetzee rarely presents a straightforward idea. David and Lucy’s relationship is an example of the vague middle ground that Coetzee enjoys exploring so much. In particular, David’s attempt to get Lucy to talk about her trauma is both admirable and ill-advised. It’s clear that Lucy is repressing her emotions, as evidenced by the fact that she insists upon not talking about what happened but then launches into how devastating it was to notice her attackers’ “personal hatred.” At the same time, though, David’s methods of forcing his daughter to rehash this terrible experience are overbearing and insensitive, completely ignoring Lucy’s wish to process her trauma in her own fashion. This is why Lucy says that she needs to choose whether or not to leave the farm “without being pushed.”
Themes
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Lucy tells her father that he doesn’t “understand” what she went through, but he insists he does. “I will pronounce the word we have avoided hitherto,” he says. “You were raped. Multiply. By three men.” Going on, he expresses his regret that he couldn’t do anything to save her, though she dismisses this, saying he shouldn’t blame himself. Still considering the experience, she adds that she could tell her attackers had raped women before, and David once again insists that she should leave the farm. “If I leave the farm now I will leave defeated,” Lucy says, “and will taste that defeat for the rest of my life.” Later that night, she slips a note under his door that reads: “I cannot be a child for ever. You cannot be a father for ever. I know you mean well, but you are not the guide I need, not at this time.”
In this scene, Lucy tells David once and for all that he needs to let her handle this situation on her own. Instead of succumbing to his overwhelming belief that she should move away, she recognizes the value of staying on the farm at least until she can gain a sense of personal agency. If she were to leave now, she would “leave defeated,” which would affect the way she conceives of her personal sense of power for the rest of her life. However, David has a hard time seeing this, and instead of giving her the space she needs, he speaks in painfully straightforward terms about Lucy’s rape, clearly trying to shock her into seeing things his way.
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David and Bev continue their affair, though they sometimes don’t even make love, instead just lying in each other’s arms. One evening, he tells her that Lucy doesn’t want to follow his advice, and Bev says that he doesn’t need to worry, promising that she and Bill will—along with Petrus—will help “look after her.”
Estranged from his former life as a ladies’ man, David now takes comfort in his relationship with Bev—a kind of comfort he has perhaps never experienced before, since his other affairs have been almost purely sexual, whereas his bond with Bev rests on something else. She gives him a sense of assurance that he sorely lacks, though it’s unclear how much he actually appreciates or acknowledges this.
Themes
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