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Chapter 20. One Year Before the Before
Themes
Key
LitCharts assigns a color and icon to each theme in Monday’s Not Coming, which you can use to track the themes throughout the work.
Child Abuse
Family, Community, and Responsibility
Growing Up, Independence, and Friendship
Secrecy and Shame
Poverty, Social Support, and Desperation
Memory, Repression, and Trauma
Summary
Analysis
In her journal, Claudia writes to Monday. She writes that Ma hired Ms. Walker as a tutor and may even “let them put [her] in the Learning Centr!” Claudia asks where Monday is and how she can just disappear.
Claudia has lots of reasons to be upset that Monday is gone, but one of the most difficult parts is that now, Claudia has to confront her shame about her dyslexia. Claudia’s emotional turmoil surfaces here when she implies that Monday has disappeared of her own volition—disappearing is something, Claudia implies, that Monday did to Claudia.
Themes
As Ma preps a tray of cookies for the church Christmas auction, Claudia begs not to be put “in the stupid kids’ class.” Ma insists that the Learning Center just gives Claudia extra help, but Claudia knows the Learning Center will doom her socially. Claudia refuses to go, but Ma threatens to call Daddy and heads for the car, leaving Claudia to follow. In the car on the way to church, Ma says that she and Daddy want what’s best for Claudia and thought she wanted to go to high school. Claudia thinks it doesn’t matter what she wants now that Monday isn’t here to help and protect her. Ma says that Ms. Walker knows all sorts of tricks and that Claudia’s lucky to get the help.
Without Monday, Claudia’s life feels purposeless. This is especially true since Claudia feels so much shame about her dyslexia and the additional help she needs to learn how to live with it. This highlights how much Claudia shaped her life around Monday and around covering up her dyslexia. Now that she has to exist on her own and confront her learning disability, she’s going to have to come up with new goals and a new purpose.
Themes
Ms. Walker lives about three blocks from the church. Claudia goes three days per week. The first day, Ms. Walker gives Claudia colored plastic filters to help her read. They play educational games that are sometimes fun and sometimes hard. Eventually, Ma asks Ms. Walker to help Claudia with her Banneker essay.
It's telling that Claudia notes that the educational games are sometimes fun. This shows her that there is hope that life will improve if she gets help with her dyslexia. And getting help with her Banneker essay also offers hope that Claudia will still be able to carry out Monday’s dreams, even without Monday around.
Themes
When Claudia arrives at Ms. Walker’s to work on her essay, she finds Michael waiting for her on the stoop. He says that Ms. Walker is his grandma. Claudia huffily tries to keep her secret; she doesn’t want Michael thinking she’s stupid. She turns and hurries away, insisting she got her days wrong. Michael steps in front of her to stop her and puts his hands out—and Claudia’s breasts hit them. He begs Claudia not to tell Ms. Walker and then invites her to join him at the mall. Claudia agrees.
Even with the evidence that getting help for her dyslexia is a good thing, Claudia is still deeply ashamed of having a learning disability. Now that the adults in her life know she has dyslexia, it becomes even more important to her to keep this fact from her peers. However, Michael shows no signs of thinking less of Claudia, so her fears that people will think she’s stupid may be unfounded.
Themes
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Claudia isn’t sure how to explain this to Ma, but she just needs an escape. And Michael isn’t the kind of guy to arouse suspicion. At the customer service counter, Michael returns a pair of shoes for Ms. Walker and wins over the checker with his politeness. Claudia asks if he’s always so friendly but before he can answer, he shouts hellos to two girls passing. Claudia jokes that he’d be good on a go-go mic, shouting out to people in the crowd. Then, someone else greets Michael. It’s a tall guy named Kam—and Megan from dance class is with him. She looks panicky and averts her gaze.
Claudia desperately wants to feel normal, and going to the mall with a boy seems like an easy way to achieve this. But more importantly, going to the mall with Michael shows Claudia that she can connect with other people aside from Monday. It may be somewhat awkward and anxiety-inducing, but if Claudia persists and accepts Michael’s offers of friendship, she may be able to make another friend.
Themes
As Michael and Kam banter, Claudia studies Megan. She looks away still, and Claudia wonders if Megan is embarrassed to know her. The guys discuss that Michael is going to hook up a TV for Kam and Claudia thinks Kam seems familiar. But Megan is watching her watch Kam with a chilling look. Michael introduces Claudia as a fellow churchgoer, which offends Claudia. She feels a jolt of electricity when Kam recognizes Claudia as “Monday’s homegirl.” The two couples part ways and Claudia wants to chase Kam and asks where he’s seen Monday.
Claudia doesn’t think she’s normal, even though she desperately wants to be. So it follows that when she looks at Megan, she immediately jumps to thinking that Megan is ashamed or embarrassed to know her. This is, of course, only one possible explanation of many, and it reflects how self-conscious Claudia is of her learning disabilities and of Monday’s absence.
Themes
Michael, oblivious, leads Claudia to two more stores, greeting people everywhere. He finally notices Claudia is angry on the escalator and tries to offer her food or his phone to call Ma. Claudia stops in front of a Starbucks and hisses that she wants to stop here—for hot chocolate, not coffee. Once they get their hot chocolates, Michael pours packets of brown sugar into his. Claudia yelps that his teeth will fall out and Michael calls her “Grandma.” No one but Monday calls Claudia that.
Claudia wants to be appreciated and have the kind of close friendship she had with Monday, so it’s frustrating when Michael seems to distance himself from her. It’s then very unsettling when Michael uses a nickname for Claudia that Monday used, as it drives home for her that Monday isn’t here anymore. She’ll have to get used to having relationships with other people in Monday’s absence.
Themes
Claudia and Michael sit on a bench and people watch. Claudia can’t believe that Monday just ditched her. Michael interrupts to ask what Ms. Walker is asking Claudia to do and what high school Claudia wants to attend. He wrinkles his nose when she says she wants to attend Banneker. She doesn’t tell him the real answer: Monday wants to go. Michael points out that any school can help Claudia get into college and shares that he wanted to go to Banneker, but they don’t have football. He trained all summer with his dad until his dad left.
Again, Claudia seems to think that Monday “ditched” her on purpose, as though Monday is actively trying to make her life miserable. There’s no evidence that Monday left Claudia on purpose, so it’s more likely that this reflects how much Claudia is struggling with her sudden independence. Michael also implies here that Claudia doesn’t have to do everything Monday did or wanted to do—she can make her own choices and still find success.
Themes
Michael explains that his dad retired from the air force and now lives in Dubai, fixing planes and making “crazy money.” He’s going to buy Michael a car, but he won’t be home for three years. Claudia asks if Michael misses his dad. Michael does, but they’re in contact all the time over FaceTime and text. Finishing his hot chocolate, Michael says they need to get back—he told Ms. Walker he’d have Claudia back. Claudia suspects that Ma made Michael do this, but Michael laughs that Ms. Walker asked him to spend some time with a sad student who could need a friend.
When Michael reveals that Ms. Walker asked him to spend some time with Claudia, it shows Claudia that she has a robust support system that cares about her. Though Ms. Walker never appears in person in the novel, she clearly cares deeply for Claudia’s overall wellbeing and not just her academic progress. The personalized care and support that Ms. Walker gives Claudia contrasts sharply with the school’s indifference towards Monday and Claudia’s concerns about her friend’s disappearance.
Themes
Claudia gulps. Michael suddenly seems sexy and she spins away to hide her blush. She asks what else Ms. Walker told him, afraid she’s telling people that Claudia can’t read. Michael assures her his grandma just said Claudia is sad and maybe depressed. Claudia snaps that she’s not depressed and snarls that Mr. Popular should be able to cheer her up. Michael just laughs and says seriously that Claudia can talk to him. He gives her his cell number. Claudia takes it and walks away. She likes Michael—but he seems like a needle that could pop Claudia’s bubble and hurt her. The same thing hurt Monday.
For Claudia, getting involved with a boy seems extra fraught after Monday’s experience with Jacob. So even though she finds herself attracted to Michael and appreciates his kindness, she’s intent on emotionally protecting herself. Mentioning her bubble—the bubble she shared with Monday—shows that Claudia is still trying to live inside that small, insulated space and isn’t ready to step outside of it.
Themes
