One of Us is Lying: Chapter 20 Summary & Analysis

Tuesday evening, Cooper is eating dinner with his family. When his father asks him what he did with his night off, Cooper imagines what would happen if he told his father the truth about Kris—he pictures his father’s head literally exploding. He knows he can’t tell his father the truth about being gay, despite having realized that he is deeply in love with Kris—the only one who has ever made Cooper feel like a “real person.” Cooper knows, though, that being an openly gay baseball player could wreck his career—and the admission could ruin his relationship with his father.

Cooper’s father reminds him that he has to go in for steroid testing tomorrow—ever since Simon’s posthumous post, Cooper has had to get tested every week, despite the fact that he’s never touched steroids in his life. Cooper reflects on how he was sure that the secret about him on About That would be related to his sexuality, not sports—last spring, he believed Simon had figured out that he was gay, and urged one of Keely’s friends to disinvite Simon from their group’s afterparty. Cooper regrets having acted cruelly because he couldn’t deal with who he really was—and regrets that all this time later, he still can’t.

The narrative switches to Nate’s perspective; he is eating a meal with his mother at a local diner, and things between them are awkward and tense. His mother tries to make conversation about school and Nate’s hobbies and interests, but Nate shrugs off every attempt she makes to connect. He asks his mother if she’s going to be able to pay for the meal, and his mother informs him she now has a steady remote job. She offers to help Nate and his father out financially, and even help Nate secure a lawyer. As the meal goes on and Nate’s mother talks normally about her life, Nate becomes more and more afraid that she’ll never be able to stay sober, stay employed, and stay sane. He gets up and leaves, unable to deal with his fear and pain.

In the parking lot, Nate runs into Mikhail Powers, who has been waiting for him outside. Nate brushes Powers off, despite Powers’ offers to help Nate get the public’s opinion on his side. Nate gets on his bike and starts it up, reversing past Mikhail Powers’ crew and out of the lot.