As You Like It Translation Act 5, Scene 1
Enter TOUCHSTONE and AUDREY
TOUCHSTONE
We shall find a time, Audrey. Patience, gentle Audrey.
TOUCHSTONE
We'll find a time to get married soon, Audrey. Patience, kind Audrey.
AUDREY
Faith, the priest was good enough, for all the old gentleman’s saying.
AUDREY
Honestly, that priest was good enough, despite what the old gentleman said.
TOUCHSTONE
A most wicked Sir Oliver, Audrey, a most vile Martext.But, Audrey, there is a youth here in the forest lays claim to you.
TOUCHSTONE
No, Audrey: he was a wicked Sir Oliver, and a vile Martext. But, Audrey, there is a youth here in the forest who claims that you're his love.
AUDREY
Ay, I know who ’tis. He hath no interest in me in the world.
AUDREY
Yes, I know who that is. He has no claim over me, though.
Enter WILLIAM
Here comes the man you mean.
Here comes the man you mean.
TOUCHSTONE
It is meat and drink to me to see a clown. By my troth, we that have good wits have much to answer for. We shall be flouting. We cannot hold.
TOUCHSTONE
It's like a feast to me to see such a country bumpkin. I swear, we men with good wits have too much responsibility. We have to be mocking. We can't hold our tongues.
WILLIAM
Good ev'n, Audrey.
WILLIAM
Good evening, Audrey.
AUDREY
God gi' good ev'n, William.
AUDREY
God give you a good evening, William.
WILLIAM
And good ev'n to you, sir.
WILLIAM
And good evening to you, sir.
TOUCHSTONE
Good ev'n, gentle friend. Cover thy head, cover thy head.Nay, prithee, be covered. How old are you, friend?
TOUCHSTONE
Good evening, noble friend. No, put your hat back on, put your hat back on. Please, cover your head. How old are you, friend?
WILLIAM
Five-and-twenty, sir.
WILLIAM
Twenty-five, sir.
TOUCHSTONE
A ripe age. Is thy name William?
TOUCHSTONE
A mature age. Is your name William?
WILLIAM
William, sir.
WILLIAM
William, sir.
TOUCHSTONE
A fair name. Wast born i' th' forest here?
TOUCHSTONE
A nice name. Were you born in the forest here?
WILLIAM
Ay, sir, I thank God.
WILLIAM
Yes, sir, thank God.
TOUCHSTONE
“Thank God.” A good answer. Art rich?
TOUCHSTONE
"Thank God"—a good answer. Are you rich?
WILLIAM
'Faith, sir, so-so.
WILLIAM
To be honest, sir, so-so.
TOUCHSTONE
“So-so” is good, very good, very excellent good. And yet it is not: it is but so-so. Art thou wise?
TOUCHSTONE
"So-so" is good, very good, very excellently good. And yet it also isn't: it's only so-so. Are you wise?
WILLIAM
Ay, sir, I have a pretty wit.
WILLIAM
Yes, sir, I have a good mind.
TOUCHSTONE
Why, thou sayst well. I do now remember a saying: “The fool doth think he is wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool.” The heathen philosopher, when he had a desire to eat a grape, would open his lips when heput it into his mouth, meaning thereby that grapes weremade to eat and lips to open. You do love this maid?
TOUCHSTONE
Why, you speak well. Which reminds me of a saying: "The fool thinks he is wise, but the wise man knows he is a fool." A classical philosopher, when he wanted to eat a grape, would open his lips and put the grape into his mouth, thereby proving that grapes were made to eat and lips were made to open. Do you love this young lady?
WILLIAM
I do, sir.
WILLIAM
I do, sir.
TOUCHSTONE
Give me your hand. Art thou learned?
TOUCHSTONE
Give me your hand. Are you educated?
WILLIAM
No, sir.
WILLIAM
No, sir.
TOUCHSTONE
Then learn this of me: to have is to have. For it is a figure in rhetoric that drink, being poured out of a cupinto a glass, by filling the one doth empty the other. For all your writers do consent that ipse is “he.” Now, you are not ipse, for I am he.
TOUCHSTONE
Then let me educate you now: to have something is to have it. It's a common figure of speech that when a drink is poured from a cup into a glass, by filling the glass the cup becomes empty. All the authorities agree that ipse translates from the Latin as "he himself." Now, you are not ipse anymore, for I am he.
WILLIAM
Which he, sir?
WILLIAM
Which "he," sir?
TOUCHSTONE
He, sir, that must marry this woman. Therefore, you clown, abandon—which is, in the vulgar, “leave”—the society—which in the boorish is “company”—of this female—which in the common is “woman” ; which together is, abandon the society of this female, or, clown, thou perishest; or, to thy better understanding, diest; or, to wit, I kill thee, make thee away, translate thy life into death, thy liberty into bondage. I will deal in poison with thee, or in bastinado, or in steel. I will bandy with thee in faction. I will o'errun thee with policy. I will kill thee a hundred and fifty ways. Therefore tremble and depart.
TOUCHSTONE
"He," sir, who will marry this woman. Therefore, you clown, abandon—which is, in common language, "leave"—the society—which in unsophisticated language means "company"—of this female—which common people would call "woman." All together that makes: abandon the society of this female, or, clown, you'll perish. Or perhaps you'll understand it better if I say "you'll die." Or, rather, I'll kill you; do away with you; transform your life into death and your liberty into captivity. I'll poison you, or beat you with sticks, or stab you. I'll engage in a conflict with you. I'll overwhelm you with cleverness. I will kill you in a hundred and fifty ways. Therefore tremble and depart.
AUDREY
Do, good William.
AUDREY
Do as he says, good William.
WILLIAM
God rest you merry, sir.
WILLIAM
Farewell, sir.
Exit
Enter CORIN
CORIN
Our master and mistress seeks you. Come away, away.
CORIN
Our master and mistress are seeking you. Come on, let's go.
TOUCHSTONE
Trip, Audrey, trip, Audrey.—I attend, I attend.
TOUCHSTONE
Quickly, Audrey, quickly, Audrey.
[To CORIN] I'm coming, I'm coming.
Exeunt