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Act 5, Scene 1
As You Like It Translation Act 5, Scene 2
Enter ORLANDO and OLIVER
ORLANDO
Is ’t possible that on so little acquaintance you should like her? That, but seeing, you should love her? And loving, woo? And wooing, she should grant? And will you persevere to enjoy her?
ORLANDO
Is it possible that you could like her after knowing her for such a brief amount of time? And that you could fall in love after only seeing her once? And that you could woo her as soon as you fell in love? And that, being wooed, she would immediately accept your offer? And will you keep on with your plan to marry her?
OLIVER
Neither call the giddiness of it in question, the poverty of her, the small acquaintance, my sudden wooing, nor her sudden consenting, but say with me “I love Aliena”; say with her that she loves me; consent with both that we may enjoy each other. It shall be to your good, for my father’s house and all the revenue that was old Sir Rowland’s will I estate upon you, and here live and die a shepherd.
OLIVER
Don't raise questions about how quickly it all happened—or scoff at her poverty, our brief acquaintance, my sudden courtship, or her sudden consent. Just say with me, "I love Aliena," and say with her that she loves me. Give your approval to this match, so that we can enjoy each other. It will be to your advantage, for I'll leave our father's house, his wealth, and all his property to you, and I'll stay here to live and die as a shepherd.
ORLANDO
You have my consent. Let your wedding be tomorrow. Thither will I invite the duke and all’s contented followers. Go you and prepare Aliena, for look you, here comes my Rosalind.
ORLANDO
You have my consent. You can get married tomorrow. I will invite the duke and all his happy followers. Go and get Aliena ready, for look—here comes my Rosalind.
Enter ROSALIND
ROSALIND
[As Ganymede] God save you, brother.
ROSALIND
May God bless you, future brother-in-law.
OLIVER
And you, fair sister.
OLIVER
And you, fair sister-to-be.
Exit
ROSALIND
O my dear Orlando, how it grieves me to see thee wear thy heart in a scarf.
ROSALIND
Oh, my dear Orlando, it pains me to see you wearing your heart in a sling.
ORLANDO
It is my arm.
ORLANDO
It's my arm, not my heart.
ROSALIND
I thought thy heart had been wounded with the claws ofa lion.
ROSALIND
But I thought your heart had been wounded by the claws of a lion.
ORLANDO
Wounded it is, but with the eyes of a lady.
ORLANDO
It is wounded, but not by a lion—by the eyes of a lady.
ROSALIND
Did your brother tell you how I counterfeited to swoon when he showed me your handkercher?
ROSALIND
Did your brother tell you how well I pretended to faint when he showed me your handkerchief?
ORLANDO
Ay, and greater wonders than that.
ORLANDO
Yes, and also things more amazing than that.
ROSALIND
Oh, I know where you are. Nay, ’tis true. There was never anything so sudden but the fight of two rams and Caesar’s thrasonical brag of “I came, saw, and overcame.” For your brother and my sister no sooner met but they looked, no sooner looked but they loved, no sooner loved but they sighed, no sooner sighed but they asked one another the reason, no sooner knew the reason but they sought the remedy; and in these degrees have they made a pair of stairs to marriage, which they will climb incontinent, or else be incontinent before marriage. They are in the very wrath of love, and they will together. Clubs cannot part them.
ROSALIND
Oh, I know what you mean. It's true. It was as sudden as two rams fighting, or Caesar boasting "I came, I saw, I conquered." Your brother and my sister had no sooner met than they looked closely at each other; had no sooner looked than they fell in love; had no sooner loved than they sighed; no sooner sighed than they asked each other why they sighed; and no sooner learned the reason than they looked for the solution to their mutual "problem." And in this way the degrees of their courtship made a flight of stairs leading up towards marriage. They'll climb those stairs immediately, or else they'll sleep together before they get married. They are in the heat of passion, and must be together. You couldn't beat them apart with a club.
ORLANDO
They shall be married tomorrow, and I will bid the duketo the nuptial. But Oh, how bitter a thing it is to look into happiness through another man’s eyes. By so much the more shall I tomorrow be at the height of heart-heaviness, by how much I shall think my brother happy in having what he wishes for.
ORLANDO
They'll be married tomorrow, and I'll invite the duke to the wedding. But, oh, it's bitter to look at happiness through another man's eyes. And by tomorrow I'll be totally weighed down by misery, thinking how happy my brother is in getting what he wished for.
ROSALIND
Why, then, tomorrow I cannot serve your turn for Rosalind?
ROSALIND
Well then, can't I play Rosalind for you tomorrow?
ORLANDO
I can live no longer by thinking.
ORLANDO
I can't live in this fantasy anymore.
ROSALIND
I will weary you then no longer with idle talking. Knowof me then—for now I speak to some purpose—that I know you are a gentleman of good conceit. I speak not this that you should bear a good opinion of my knowledge, insomuch I say I know you are. Neither do I labor for a greater esteem than may in some little measure draw a belief from you to do yourself good, and not to grace me. Believe then, if you please, that I can do strange things. I have, since I was three year old, conversed with a magician, most profound in his art and yet not damnable. If you do love Rosalind so near the heart as your gesture cries it out, when your brother marries Aliena shall you marry her. I know into what straits of fortune she is driven, and it is not impossible to me, if it appear not inconvenient to you, to set her before your eyes tomorrow, human as she is, and without any danger.
ROSALIND
I won't weary you with idle talk then. You should know—and now I'm speaking sincerely—that I know you are an intelligent gentleman. I'm not saying this so you'll have a good opinion of my knowledge, as I say I "know" you're intelligent. I'm not trying to increase my reputation either—I only hope you might have some confidence in my ability to do something good for you. I'm not trying to bring favor on myself. Believe me, then, when I say that I can make strange things happen. Since I was three years old I have been in contact with a magician. He is very powerful, but he doesn't practice evil magic. If you love Rosalind as much as your behavior implies, then you will marry her when your brother marries Aliena. I know Rosalind's situation and where she is. And it's not impossible for me to set her before you tomorrow—whole, human, and unharmed—so long as it doesn't seem improper to you.
ORLANDO
Speak’st thou in sober meanings?
ORLANDO
Is what you're saying serious?
ROSALIND
By my life I do, which I tender dearly, though I say I am a magician. Therefore put you in your best array, bidyour friends; for if you will be married tomorrow, you shall, and to Rosalind, if you will.
ROSALIND
I swear on my life, which I value dearly, even though I said I'm a magician. Therefore put on your finest clothes and invite your friends. For if you want to be married tomorrow, you will, and if you want Rosalind to be the bride, she will.
Enter SILVIUS and PHOEBE
Look, here comes a lover of mine and a lover of hers.
Look, here comes someone who loves me, and someone who loves her.
PHOEBE
Youth, you have done me much ungentlenessTo show the letter that I writ to you.
PHOEBE
[To ROSALIND] Boy, you were very rude to me when you showed off the letter I wrote to you.
ROSALIND
I care not if I have. It is my study To seem despiteful and ungentle to you. You are there followed by a faithful shepherd. Look upon him, love him; he worships you.
ROSALIND
I don't care if I was. I am purposefully being contemptuous and rude to you. You are followed by a faithful shepherd even now. Look at him, and love him! He worships you.
PHOEBE
Good shepherd, tell this youth what ’tis to love.
PHOEBE
Good shepherd, tell this youth what it is to be in love.
SILVIUS
It is to be all made of sighs and tears, And so am I for Phoebe.
SILVIUS
It is to be filled with sighs and tears, as I am for Phoebe.
PHOEBE
And I for Ganymede.
PHOEBE
And as I am for Ganymede.
ORLANDO
And I for Rosalind.
ORLANDO
And as I am for Rosalind.
ROSALIND
And I for no woman.
ROSALIND
And as I am for no woman.
SILVIUS
It is to be all made of faith and service, And so am I for Phoebe.
SILVIUS
It is to be filled with faithfulness and servitude, as I am for Phoebe.
PHOEBE
And I for Ganymede.
PHOEBE
And as I am for Ganymede.
ORLANDO
And I for Rosalind.
ORLANDO
And as I am for Rosalind.
ROSALIND
And I for no woman.
ROSALIND
And as I am for no woman.
SILVIUS
It is to be all made of fantasy, All made of passion and all made of wishes, All adoration, duty, and observance, All humbleness, all patience and impatience, All purity, all trial, all observance, And so am I for Phoebe.
SILVIUS
It is to be filled with fantasy; filled with passion and wishes; with adoration, duty, and devotion; humility, patience, and impatience; filled with purity, suffering, and obedience—just as I am for Phoebe.
PHOEBE
And so am I for Ganymede.
PHOEBE
And as I am for Ganymede.
ORLANDO
And so am I for Rosalind.
ORLANDO
And as I am for Rosalind.
ROSALIND
And so am I for no woman.
ROSALIND
And as I am for no woman.
PHOEBE
If this be so, why blame you me to love you?
PHOEBE
[To ROSALIND] If all this is true, then why do you blame me for loving you?
SILVIUS
If this be so, why blame you me to love you?
SILVIUS
[To PHOEBE] And why do you blame me for loving you?
ORLANDO
If this be so, why blame you me to love you?
ORLANDO
And why do you blame me for loving you?
ROSALIND
Why do you speak, too, “Why blame you me to love you?”?
ROSALIND
Who are you speaking to, Orlando?
ORLANDO
To her that is not here, nor doth not hear.
ORLANDO
To the woman who isn't here, and doesn't hear me.
ROSALIND
Pray you, no more of this. 'Tis like the howling of Irish wolves against the moon. [to SILVIUS] I will helpyou, if I can. [to PHOEBE] I would love you if I could.— Tomorrow meet me all together. [to PHOEBE] I will marry you if ever I marry woman, and I’ll be married tomorrow. [to ORLANDO] I will satisfy you if ever I satisfy man, and you shall be married tomorrow. [to SILVIUS] I will content you, if what pleases you contents you, and you shall be married tomorrow. [to ORLANDO] As you love Rosalind, meet. [to SILVIUS] As you love Phoebe, meet.— And as I love no woman, I’ll meet. So fare you well. I have left you commands.
ROSALIND
Please, no more of this. You're like a pack of wolves howling passionately at the moon.
[To SILVIUS] I will help you, if I can.
[To PHOEBE] I would love you, if I could.
All of you, meet me tomorrow.
[To PHOEBE] If I'm going to ever marry a woman, it will be you—and I'm getting married tomorrow.
[To ORLANDO] If I'm ever going to satisfy a man, I'll satisfy you, and you'll be married tomorrow too.
[To SILVIUS] I'll make you happy, if the thing you desire will make you happy, and you too will be married tomorrow.
[To ORLANDO] By your love for Rosalind, come tomorrow.
[To SILVIUS] By your love for Phoebe, come tomorrow.
And by my love for no woman, I'll meet you all here tomorrow too. So farewell. You know what I want you to do.
SILVIUS
I’ll not fail, if I live.
SILVIUS
If I'm alive, I won't miss it.
PHOEBE
Nor I.
PHOEBE
Me neither.
ORLANDO
Nor I.
ORLANDO
Me neither.
Exeunt
