In “Dark Roots,” the contraceptive pills that the protagonist takes symbolize the societal pressure on women to alter their bodies and suppress their own needs in order to be attractive and desirable partners. Though she originally acquires them from the doctor at the optimistic beginning of her relationship with Paul, by the end of the story the protagonist refers to the pills as “poison.” Though the protagonist willingly acquires these pills, she does so at the expense of her true desire to have a child, which she hides from Paul because she assumes, based on society’s messaging about young, desirable women, that he doesn’t feel the same way and will reject her if she’s honest about what she wants. Moreover, the many side-effects of the pills—most prominently for the story, increased appetite and self-doubt—contribute to the protagonist reaching her breaking point when she tires of working to appear younger. Thus, the protagonist’s contraceptive pills literally suppress her true desires in order to make her more desirable to her lover (or so she believes).
Contraceptive Pills Quotes in Dark Roots
“You’re not a smoker, are you?”
“No.”
“Only because if you were, at your age, I’d never be prescribing this brand.”
And you feel that little swoop again, hear the at your age like stepping on a sharp piece of gravel, a wince at ludicrous defensiveness.
You start thinking you actually have those rich chestnut highlights in your hair naturally. Well. You know the rest. You know how it all goes. Then, a week into the contraceptives, you’re ravenous.
Thirteen years ago you were living in London, fervently avoiding any chance of children. Now you’re one of those nuisance women obstetricians must hate, waking up to the alarm on your biological clock just before it runs itself down…. [E]very pill sticks in your throat like a sugar-coated lie.
He goes and buys fish and chips and you eat them at a picnic table, everything dazzling and warm. But once that poison has started, once you’re committed to giving yourself a measured dose of it every day, nothing’s going to be enough. You have traded in your unselfconsciousness for this double-visioned state of standing outside yourself, watchful and tensed for exposure.