The Girl Who Drank the Moon

by

Kelly Barnhill

The Girl Who Drank the Moon: Chapter 18 Summary & Analysis

Summary
Analysis
Xan can’t deny that her magic is dwindling. She’s traveling slowly and everything hurts. She’s not afraid to die—she’s seen thousands die, and they all look joyous as they go—but still, she knows that the months before she dies won’t be dignified. She remembers how painful it was for Zosimos, but reminds herself that everything is for Luna. Xan stands at the top of the hill leading down to the Protectorate. She can sense the unhappiness down there, and chastises herself for never trying to help the people. She doesn’t know why, but as she gets closer, she feels increasingly desperate to leave. She remembers crying in her room in the old castle and listening to a voice on the other side of the door saying “more.” Xan hates remembering.
Remember that Xan will die as Luna’s magic comes into its full power. Xan’s poor health here suggests that Luna is getting closer and closer to having access to her magic, but Xan is doing exactly what she shouldn’t be doing: insisting still that she doesn’t need to remember anything. This means that Xan isn’t considering how to handle Luna’s magic, and is instead just ignoring that it’s a problem at all. This contributes to Luna feeling more alone, and means that in practice, Luna actually is alone.
Themes
Memory, Forgetting, and the Future Theme Icon
Sorrow vs. Hope Theme Icon
The madwoman watches the Witch walk, even though the Witch is impossibly far away. She wonders if she knew how to see things like this before she went mad. Now, she knows that knowledge is like jewels, and that she can gather it if she tries. She knows where the Witch lives and where she takes the sacrificed children. Every morning, Sister Ignatia asks how much sorrow the madwoman experiences. While the madwoman’s sorrow fed Sister Ignatia for years, the madwoman learned how to lock her sorrow away with hope and somehow knew the name “Sorrow Eater.” The madwoman watches Xan and watches the Elders with a baby. She wants to tell the parents that they’re looking the wrong direction. She folds a map into a paper bird and aims it at the baby.
Now that the madwoman has discovered that the Witch of the stories isn’t real—Xan protects the sacrificed babies—she understands that the stories’ only purpose is to keep those in the Protectorate sad and controlled under Sister Ignatia’s thumb. Now that the madwoman also knows the name “Sorrow Eater,” which refers to Sister Ignatia, it confirms that Sister Ignatia truly does ingest sorrow somehow, and has constructed the Protectorate in such a way as to feed herself. The Day of Sacrifice, then, ensures that Sister Ignatia always has something to eat.
Themes
Family and Love Theme Icon
Storytelling, Censorship, and Control Theme Icon
Memory, Forgetting, and the Future Theme Icon
Sorrow vs. Hope Theme Icon
As Gherland shifts the baby, he thinks that he finds the whole business annoying. He loves the pomp, but the babies are selfish and stinky. He knows it’s silly, but he misses Antain. He feels like the Council lost something when Antain resigned, but he tries to tell himself otherwise. The baby spits up on Gherland and Gherland praises himself for being so honorable and selfless. Along the road, Antain makes eye contact with Gherland and then slips away and runs, hidden, ahead of the Elders to the clearing. Ethyne, who is now Antain’s wife, stands at the road. They want a family, but Antain remembers the madwoman and leaving the baby. He feels guilty that he’s let so many babies go, feeling that he couldn’t do anything.
Though Gherland is still powerful, he clearly isn’t happy. He still dwells on negative emotions and hates this whole affair. In this sense, it’s easy to see that Gherland’s annoyance is actually feeding Sister Ignatia as well and contributing to the Protectorate’s collective sadness, despite the fact that Gherland is still profiting from this sadness. Antain’s behavior, however, suggests that he’s decided to take action and attempt to break the cycle of sorrow and silence.
Themes
Sorrow vs. Hope Theme Icon
Now, Antain realizes that he also always believed that he’d be alone, but love proved him wrong. He wonders if they’re wrong about the Witch and the sacrifice, and what would happen if they tried to stop it. He thinks it’d be better to have a baby in a world that’s fair and kind and vows to try to reason with the Witch. In the clearing, he finds the madwoman’s paper bird and holds it close.
These questions demonstrate that when a person can bring themselves to hope, they can begin to overcome others’ attempts at controlling and censoring them. Because Antain now sees that he’s been wrong in other instances, he can see that it’s possible for him to be wrong in many places.
Themes
Storytelling, Censorship, and Control Theme Icon
Sorrow vs. Hope Theme Icon
Quotes
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Xan is late to fetch the baby. She uses her magic to sprint to the baby’s side but as she arrives, Antain steps in front of her. Surprised and afraid, Xan calls on her magic and flings Antain. She transforms into a hawk, grabs the baby, and flies away. The madwoman watches all of this and feels nothing, but she remembers the smell of her baby’s scalp, and wanting to fly. She watches Antain and regrets giving him the scars, though she reasons that they kept silly girls away. She watches him open the paper bird. It says, “don’t forget.” In her soul, the madwoman feels paper birds and real birds leap and soar.
For Xan, coming upon Antain like this puts her in a position where she feels as though she has to act quickly. But in doing so, Xan deprives herself of important information—namely, that Antain could tell her about the Day of Sacrifice and why she finds a baby in the clearing every year. Her fear and desire to do the right thing, however, keep Xan from deviating from her path and asking difficult questions.
Themes
Memory, Forgetting, and the Future Theme Icon
Sorrow vs. Hope Theme Icon