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Chapter Ten
Themes
Key
LitCharts assigns a color and icon to each theme in Before We Were Free, which you can use to track the themes throughout the work.
Coming of Age and Political Consciousness
Adulthood, Childhood, and Fear
Family and Politics
Storytelling and Trauma
Summary
Analysis
Anita stands outside, bundled up with Carla and Yo in Queens. It’s Thanksgiving and they’re waiting for the snow. Most of the family is here to celebrate and there are enough cooks that Carla and her sisters don’t have to help. Instead, the girls have been walking around the block past where Carla’s crush lives. Since getting to the U.S., Carla has become boy crazy. She insists it’s what happens to girls in seventh grade, but Anita doesn’t share that she became boy crazy last year, in sixth grade. Anita and her family have been here for a few weeks now. She’s in the sixth grade at Carla’s school, but she might be able to move up to seventh grade by spring. Mami says they’ll stay in New York until their hearts are healed.
Now that Anita and her cousins live in Queens, it’s clear that they plan to stay in New York. Being around other girls her age again immerses Anita fully in the changes of puberty. Now she sees Carla undergoing the same transformation she did during her final months in the Dominican Republic. For Carla, though, it doesn’t seem like these changes are going to be as terrifying or anxiety inducing as they were for Anita. Rather, her concerns center on getting a glimpse of her crush, no matter what it takes—a charmingly trivial concern compared to Anita’s fear of sexual violence. This suggests that, even though their lives in New York will not be easy or free of pain, they at least might be liberated from some of the worst aspects of the Trujillo regime and Anita might be able to grow up in safety and comfort.
Themes
Mami appears on the step to say it’s time to eat. She looks sad and thin in her black dress and coat, though she’s excited for Anita to see snow. The girls follow Mami inside and Mami and Anita put their arms around each other. In the last few weeks, they’ve gotten close again, like they used to be when Anita was little. Mami sighs that it’s hard to adjust to everything looking gray and dead. From the corner of her eye, Anita spots white dust—but she doesn’t think it’s snow, since she expects big lacy doilies. Inside, she sits with the other children. Tío Carlos and Papito say a prayer and try not to cry. Fifi shouts “Amen,” making everyone laugh.
With all the change and trauma that took place in Mami and Anita’s life in the last year, it’s not surprising that they’re growing closer to each other. This also suggests that Anita has reached a new phase in her maturity, as she’s now able to see Mami as a person and as a friend, not just as an authority figure. This Thanksgiving dinner is difficult for everyone, as they miss Papi and Tío Toni. But because they’re together, their grief is more manageable.
Themes
Earlier, Mrs. Washburn called to talk to Mami. Then, Mami handed Anita the phone to talk to Sam. Sam offered his condolences and then invited Anita to visit. Anita could tell that Mrs. Washburn was coaching him through the conversation. Carla hovered, interested to see if Anita was madly in love with Sam, but Anita shook her head. She invited Sam to come visit once she and Mami have a place to live, but she doesn’t want to marry him. Back in the present, Anita finishes her meal. Then, Mami comes out carrying a birthday cake to celebrate Anita’s 13th birthday a few weeks early. Anita only wants one thing that she can’t have, so Mami suggests she save her wish for later.
Anita’s awkward conversation with Sam impresses upon her that she’s not in love with him anymore. The discrepancy in their maturity is very clear, since Sam’s mother is coaching him through the call. Now, Anita has grown enough to see how childish and immature her crush on him was. When the family celebrates Anita’s birthday as well as Thanksgiving, it suggests again that even despite tragedy and horror, life goes on. Anita will continue to get older—and her family will continue to be there to support her and celebrate her along the way. Presumably, her wish is for Papi to come back, but her ability to acknowledge that it can’t happen shows that she’s processing her grief, moving forward, and seeing the world maturely. Mami suggesting that she save her wish indicates that grief lessens over time—it’s possible that, soon enough, she’ll have other wishes to distract her.
Themes
Once the cake is gone, Yo asks if they can go out into the snow. Tía Laura insists they have to sit and digest for a while. The adults tell stories about Papi while Anita looks out the window. She’s glad she’s experiencing her first snow before she’s 13. Now, she’ll be able to tell her kids she did lots of things, like lived in a closet and had two boyfriends, by 13. Finally, Tía Laura lets the kids go outside. As Anita steps out, she hears Papito say that the new government will return the compound to the family. They’ll have to decide whether or not to sell it.
When Anita talks about wanting to tell her kids about all the things she’s done before turning 13, it suggests she’s turned the corner as she heals from her trauma. Even if she’s still struggling, she can now look forward to telling her story—and she sees that story as proof of her courage and resilience, rather than simply an emblem of her pain. Her story might also inspire her children to value family and political freedom, as Anita and her parents did.
Themes
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A few days ago, Tío Pepe came to visit. He thanked Mami for sacrificing her husband to liberate the Dominican Republic. He also gave Anita a letter from Oscar. These days, Anita isn’t sure how she feels about Oscar. In the letter, Oscar offered his condolences and said he tried to write many times. He couldn’t send anything because of the censors. But now, the Dominican Republic is going to hold its first free election in 31 years, thanks to Papi and Tío Toni. Oscar also wrote that he ran into Chucha at Wimpy’s. She asked him to tell Anita to remember her wings. Now, Anita understands what Chucha and Papi meant. It’s a metaphor—they want Anita to be free inside so nothing can take away her liberty.
Now, Anita has to confront the fact that many see Papi as a martyr, not just as a member of her family. This is somewhat painful for Anita, because as much as she wanted the Dominican Republic to be free, losing her father is an unimaginable sacrifice. While for everyone else, Papi’s death is redeemed somewhat by the country holding a free election, that’s obviously less comforting for Anita, who lost both her father and her home after the assassination. However, Anita also understands now why Papi did what he did. He was fighting for everyone, not just for his family, and now, back in the Dominican Republic, people are hopeful about the future because of Papi’s courage and vision. When Anita realizes that her wings are not just about fleeing the Dominican Republic, but also about cultivating a sense of internal freedom, she can understand even more what her father did. By assassinating Trujillo, Papi was honoring his inner freedom—he was living as though he were already free, as though nothing else were an option. In this way, her wings are a family legacy, both inherited and earned.
Themes
The snow is magical. It makes Anita feel light and bright, like she’s waking up from a bad dream. She closes her eyes and sees Papi sitting on the edge of her bed, asking her to promise. Anita shakes her head to clear it. Fifi asks to make a snowman, but Sandi suggests they make snow angels and coaches everyone through the process. They all run inside afterward. Tía Laura scolds the girls that they’ll catch “deathly colds.” These days, dying doesn’t seem as scary to Anita. It’s scarier to be alive, especially since Anita suspects she’ll never be as happy as she was as a little kid. But Anita keeps thinking of Chucha’s dream of the family flying. Hopefully this means the family will escape their misery, not just the dictator.
Anita looks more and more mature as she says that dying doesn’t seem so frightening anymore. This is in part because Anita now knows how stressful and scary it can be to stay alive, and in part because she understands the value of sacrificing for a cause. At this point, Anita has an adult perspective on her childhood. As a child, Anita was happy, carefree, and didn’t know anything about how her world worked. Now that she’s becoming a teenager, she feels totally distant from that—too much has happened since, and she has learned too many difficult truths. Her job now is to figure out how to find that childlike sense of happiness, in spite of everything she knows about the world—that is part of what it means to cultivate inner freedom and remember her wings.
Themes
That night, Anita sits in the bedroom she shares with the García girls. Carla gets up to look out the window. She calls the others to the window to see their snow angels, which are illuminated by the outdoor light. But when Anita looks down she sees butterflies, not angels. If Chucha were here, she’d think it was a sign. Anita closes her eyes and thinks about all her friends and family members who died to make her free. She promises Papi she’ll try.
As the novel ends, Anita understands that Papi wanted her to be happy, not just physically free. Seeing the butterflies—symbols of hope and freedom—impresses upon her the importance of carrying on and making Papi proud, no matter how hard that seems. While Papi dreamed that the family would be free in the Dominican Republic, Anita is beginning to understand that it’s fine to be free in New York instead—after all, she’s seeing butterflies in the snow, which blends the world of her childhood with her new life in New York. Papi died for her to get here and it’s Anita’s turn to make his sacrifice worth it.
Themes
