LitCharts assigns a color and icon to each theme in The Memory Keeper’s Daughter, which you can use to track the themes throughout the work.
Secrets and Lies
Memory and the Past
Difference and Prejudice
Families Born and Made
Summary
Analysis
Paul stands outside a church beside Phoebe, listening to organ music spill from inside as his mother and Frederic—newly married—happily head outside into a spray of confetti. Phoebe remarks how pretty the wedding is, and asks Paul if Norah is really going to live in France. He says that she is—and reminds Phoebe that the two of them are scheduled to go visit Norah and Frederic in a couple of months. Paul sees worry flash across Phoebe’s face, and he asks her what’s wrong—she replies that she doesn’t want to eat any snails while she’s there.
Phoebe has spent all her life growing up in one family, but now, she is happy and relaxed around her “new” family, as well. The way Phoebe experiences the world has shielded her from the grief and confusion that Paul, Norah, and David suffered for years.
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Themes
As Paul and Phoebe watch Norah and Frederic join the party on the lawn and cut into their wedding cake, Phoebe talks dreamily about her own wedding. She says she wants a big cake, and “lots and lots of pink flowers.” Paul thinks of Phoebe’s parents, Caroline and Al, who have left her here for the weekend while they take their first real vacation together.
As the novel approaches its end, many characters are getting the things they’ve longed for. Norah reconnects with her daughter and finds love to boot, while Caroline and Al explore a new part of their relationship.
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Paul asks Phoebe if she likes Pittsburgh—he has just been offered a job there with an orchestra. Phoebe says Pittsburgh is nice. Paul asks her if she’d like it if he moved there—she says it would be nice, and as a bonus, he could come to her wedding. Phoebe’s face darkens, though, as she remarks how unfair it is that weddings are so expensive. Paul silently thinks to himself how unfair a lot of Phoebe’s life has been—in spite of the fact that she deserves the world.
Paul’s desire to move to Pittsburgh shows that he wants to spend more time around his sister and get to know her better. He clearly loves her, and yet there is a bittersweet quality to their relationship, as he knows that he has advantages in life that Phoebe never will.
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Phoebe runs off to dance, and Norah comes over to Paul. The two of them watch her, and Paul, stricken by pain and sadness, asks Norah how David could never have told them about her. Norah encourages Paul not to be angry with David, but instead to have empathy for how his life became warped by such a huge secret. Paul accuses Norah of defending David—she says that what she’s really trying to do is forgive him.
Though Norah has great reason to be angry with David and rail against the course her life took in the wake of his cruel decision, she instead is choosing empathy—she wants to be able to forgive her late ex-husband, move forward, and be grateful for the things she does have.
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Themes
Quotes
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When Paul tells Norah that he might take a job in Pittsburgh, Norah warns him that he can’t “fix the past”—his life is his own, now, and Phoebe is okay without them. Norah embraces Paul and tells him how proud she is of him.
Norah warns Paul against making the same mistakes his father made—trying to reclaim the past, or even alter it.
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Themes
At the end of the celebration, as Frederic and Norah drive off together, Paul and Phoebe get into Paul’s car and head back to Pittsburgh—Paul is going to stay with her for a couple days. As they drive through the countryside, Paul considers all the what-ifs of his and Phoebe’s lives, and wonders what things would be like had they been able to grow up together. Before getting on the interstate, Paul decides to take a detour.
Even though Paul has heard his mother’s advice, he can’t help but wonder what his and Phoebe’s lives might have looked like had their father made a different decision. Paul has let go of his resentment, but has not healed fully.
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Themes
Paul and Phoebe arrive at the Lexington cemetery, where they visit David’s grave. As they look at the headstone, Paul feels an overwhelming sadness, and Phoebe comforts him. Paul is grateful to be able to see through the haze of anger he’s felt for so long. Paul is startled and touched as Phoebe begins to sing a hymn in her thin, lovely voice. Paul joins her in song and takes her hand. It is small, he notes—"just like their mother’s.”
At David’s gravesite, Paul unexpectedly finds peace as he shares a profound moment of connection with the sister he spent his whole life dreaming of. They may have been deprived of getting to grow up together—but they have one another to lean on now.