Here, Matt begins to articulate the idea that because he and Attean have different ideas of what it means to be a man, neither of them would be able to just slip into the other’s culture. Ideas of masculinity are so tied to their individual cultures that finding fulfillment in a different culture feels next to impossible. Matt also acknowledges how much he’s come to care about and respect Attean. This is one of the reasons why he wishes Attean had shaken his hand: it would show him that Attean respects him in turn.