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Chapter 4
Themes
Key
LitCharts assigns a color and icon to each theme in Lakota Woman, which you can use to track the themes throughout the work.
Activism and Resistance
Assimilation, Tradition, and Identity
Unity, Inclusion, and Equality
Racism and Sexism
Summary
Analysis
The generational differences between Mary—and Mary’s siblings—and her mother made life at home difficult. Mary’s mother had strict Christian beliefs, and she was apprehensive of her friends’ judgment. When Barbara got pregnant in high school, Mary’s mother told Barbara that she was disowning her; later, when Sandra got pregnant, Mary’s mother reacted in a similar way. All the same, Mary knew that her mother would always defend them, if need be.
Mary’s mother’s assimilation to white society caused tension in the family home. Mary’s mother’s anxiety about her friends’ judgment suggests that pressures to assimilate fostered antagonism and competition between Native Americans, as those who assimilated to Christianity and white society judged those who didn’t as inferior. Mary’s mother’s desire for her Christian friends to accept her led her to disparage her own daughters, whom she spurned for getting pregnant. This instance also highlights the sexism that Native American women face within their communities. By shaming them for their pregnancies, Mary’s mother expressed the expectation that women shouldn’t have sex before marriage and that those who do are unworthy of respect.
Themes
Eventually, tired of the generational rift between her and her mother, Mary left home and started traveling with a band of kids, drifting around the country and stealing food when they needed to. Drinking and drug usage was common among these groups: Mary liked smoking pot, and Barb took a lot of acid. Mary now sees that there was an “emptiness underneath all this frenzied wandering,” as though she and the other travelers were waiting for a sign or message.
Unlike her mother, Mary refused to assimilate. To escape the pressure to assimilate, she found a group of like-minded youths to roam with. While Mary recognizes that their traveling was purposeless, she never seems to regret her decision to rebel against her mother’s strict rules, which suggests that, for Mary, defying her mother’s demands to assimilate and leaving the toxic home environment were the right choice.
Themes
To sustain themselves, the groups of roaming youth shoplifted—or “liberated” items—from stores. They didn’t feel guilty about stealing; in fact, they saw it as a form of justice. After all, white store owners and white government officials had been stealing from the Native Americans for decades. For example, agents who were supposed to distribute government goods often stole them for themselves. Later, when trading posts were established, store owners would inflate prices because they had no competition—typically, there was only one store per area.
Mary and her friends viewed stealing from the stores as a way to get back at a society that has stolen so much from indigenous people. Seeing it as an act of resistance, the youth didn’t feel guilty about stealing and, even now, Mary shows no regret, which suggests that she continues to view this behavior as part of her activism.
Themes
Another reason that Mary never felt guilty for shoplifting was that the store owners provoked it—white store owners would follow Native Americans around the store, watching their every move and expecting them to steal. Stealing started to feel like a challenge, and Mary got very good at it.
The shop owners’ racism also prompted Mary and her friends to steal. Because white shop owners expected Mary and her Native American friends to steal, they reasoned that they might as well actually steal if shop owners were going to treat them like thieves anyway. Stealing also “punished” store owners for their racism, and getting back at these people felt better than passively accepting their racism.
Themes
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Mary got caught only twice, but after getting caught the second time, she realized that shoplifting wasn’t worth the risk of getting imprisoned. If she was going to get arrested, she wanted it to be for a more significant reason. Plus, she realized that there were more effective ways to fight for her and her people’s rights.
Mary only stopped shoplifting when she realized that she could fight against racist white society in more effective ways—she still wanted to take action and advocate for her rights, but she knew that shoplifting wasn’t going to create the meaningful change she wanted.
Themes
But, more often than not, Mary and her fellow travelers weren’t arrested for what they did, but rather because they were Native Americans. One evening, while traveling, Mary’s group got a flat tire. They pulled to the side of the road for the boys to fix it and, in the meantime, the girls made a fire. Suddenly, police arrived and arrested them all, saying that a farmer charged them for attempted arson and trespassing, among other similar, trumped-up charges. The police jailed the group of kids for two days before declaring them not guilty. Discriminatory arrests deeply affect a person—they make one want to commit the crimes they’re charged with.
This anecdote emphasizes the racism of white society and law enforcement. Mary and her fellow travelers were simply trying to fix their car—they weren’t causing any problems. Mary implies that the farmer called the police out of his racial bias against indigenous people—that he assumed the kids were causing trouble solely because they were Native American. Mary says that these racially motivated arrests took a mental toll on her and her fellow travelers. She argues that, when a person knows that they are going to get arrested no matter what they do, they become tempted to actually commit crimes. The implication is that committing the crime feels like an act of resistance against a society that is going to try to punish them no matter what they do. This anecdote also reveals the gender roles built into this traveling group: while the men fix the car, the women perform the domestic duties (building a fire).
Themes
Within the bands of travelers, having sex with multiple partners was common. In fact, many of the young men had an entitled attitude toward the women, simply expecting the women to have sex with them on request. Barb and Mary didn’t appreciate this attitude—both of them wanted more commitment in their sexual relationships.
Mary reveals that there were gendered expectations within the groups of travelers regarding sex. Men felt entitled to women’s bodies, as though women were simply objects. This attitude of expectation is in sharp contrast to the expectations of chastity and purity that Mary received during her upbringing from the missionary teachers and her mother. Though Mary doesn’t explicitly say so, she implies that these two disparate demands on women’s bodies and behavior pins women into an impossible position: they are shamed for having sex while they are pressured into appeasing men’s sexual appetites. These expectations do not leave room for a woman’s desires. For example, Barb and Mary didn’t want to be used as sexual objects, but it's also apparent that they did want to have sex. But under these competing social pressures, their desires for committed relationships went unfulfilled.
Themes
Mary notes that while Lakota men speak eloquently about the important role of women within a tribe, many men do not treat women with respect. Women are expected to do a lot of domestic chores and craftwork. When young Lakota men claim that this is because men need to keep their hands and arms free to protect the women or go on hunts, Mary sarcastically retorts that they should “get [her] a buffalo” if they insist on being traditional.
Mary illustrates that, within Lakota culture, men expect women to bear the burden of all domestic duties. On top of this, many Lakota men simply do not respect women, as their sexual objectification of women demonstrates. Mary gets fed up with their lip-service about traditional gender expectations. Not only are gender roles reductive, but the men appear to expect women to maintain their traditional roles—doing domestic chores and craftwork—while they (the men) don’t carry out their end of the bargain—providing food—especially because modern white society has exterminated the traditional way of life. In this anecdote, Mary sarcastically tells men to hunt for her if they expect her to do domestic work for them, knowing full well that the men cannot hunt the same way that Lakota men did prior to white settlement. The implication is that, in a changing world, gender expectations should change to adapt to the times.
Themes
In Lakota lore, there are important female figures and heroines, like Grandmother Earth and White Buffalo Woman, the woman who brought the Lakota the sacred pipe. Menstruating women are banned from rituals because they are considered to possess a powerful force that can make ceremonies ineffective. But in modern-day Lakota society, the traditional celebrations for a girl’s first menstruation are gone—instead, menstruation is viewed with disgust.
Mary calls attention to how modern Lakota society doesn’t reflect the same respect given to women that traditional Lakota beliefs espouse. The Lakota religion includes many important and revered female figures; additionally, it is believed that all women possess power when menstruating. But Mary argues that, while modern Lakota men claim respect for the female figures of Lakota lore, they do not respect modern Lakota women in the same way. This clarifies another reason for why Mary gets annoyed when men expect her to follow traditional gender roles—the men don’t give her the same respect that traditional Lakota society attached to those traditional expectations for women.
Themes
A man raped Mary when she was about 15 years old. The violent incident traumatized Mary, who felt so ashamed about the incident that she didn’t tell anyone what had happened.
Mary reveals that she is a victim of sexual violence. While sexual violence is a threat to all women, Native American women in particular suffer from sexual violence at a disproportionate rate.
Themes
Tragically, it’s not uncommon for Native American women to be raped. White officers often arrested Native American women on sham charges in order to rape them in jail or in their cars. Any legal complaints raised by Native American women are often dismissed by judges, which only encourages women to stay silent about the sexual abuses they suffered. Mary notes that this is changing, as more Native American women are courageously stepping forward to fight against the rapes and forced sterilizations that they endure.
Not only do many Native American women suffer from the trauma of rape and sexual violence, but law enforcement—the people who ostensibly exist to protect others—target Native American women. This racially motivated sexual violence is a widespread problem in the Native American community; it also destroys any trust between Native American women and the U.S. justice system. The implication is that, while sexual violence is a problem for all women, Native American women suffer in particular. Not only do perpetrators target them because of their race, but the justice system doesn’t give Native American women’s cases the same amount of attention that they give to white women’s cases. On a more hopeful note, Mary says that, thanks to the activism of many Native American women, more people are becoming aware of the sexual abuses and reproductive violations that white society and the U.S. government commit against Native American women.
Themes
In the groups Mary traveled with, the men typically wanted to have commitment- and responsibility-free sex with women. Once, she played a joke on a Native American man who climbed into her sleeping bag without waiting for her to give him permission. Mary was eight months pregnant at the time but didn’t say a thing—she stayed silent as her groped her breast and slid his hand down her body. As soon as his hand touched her swollen belly, he stopped, shocked and confused. She exclaimed that she was starting to go into labor; he leapt out of her sleeping bag in a hurry.
In this anecdote, Mary exposes the entitlement of some Native American men, as well as their fear of commitment. A man non-consensually climbed into Mary’s sleeping bag and groped her. He only left when he found out that she is pregnant, which is representative of the many men who leave their female sexual partners when they become pregnant. As Mary has discussed, this entitlement and non-committal attitude among men is what leaves so many Native American women with the burden of raising children alone.
Themes
On the whole, Mary respects Native American men for their dedication and bravery in the fight for Native American rights and in protecting Native American women from “outsiders,” even though they could be cruel to women at the same time.
But Mary makes it clear that she does respect Native American men for all that they do in the fight for indigenous civil rights. She also notes that they are quick to protect women from non-indigenous men, which she appreciates, although it’s clear that she wishes that they’d personally be more respectful of women. Mary’s joint respect and frustration with Native American men exposes how Native American women’s gender and race complicate their fight for civil rights; they want to stand by their fellow Native American men to advocate for indigenous rights and for women’s rights, even though they experience discrimination from both Native American men and from white women.
Themes
For instance, Native American men are protective of Native American women when white men sexually harass them. Once, while staying in Pierre, South Dakota for the trial of some AIM (American Indian Movement) members, some white men sexually harassed Barb while she was walking to a motel parking lot. She ran back into the motel she was staying at, where she found Tom Poor Bear, an Oglala boy who was also staying at the motel. He walked out to the parking lot with her and ordered the white men to apologize. They refused, one of them saying, “I don’t apologize to her kind ever.”
This anecdote illustrates how white men harass Native American women because of their race and gender. In this instance, a group of white men picked Barb to sexually harass because she is Native American—it’s clear that they viewed Native American women as inferior to white women given the man’s comment that he didn’t “apologize to her kind ever.” It's likely that these white men were aware that the U.S. justice system would protect them if a Native American woman tried to press charges, as the government does not treat Native American women as equal to white people, including white women.
Themes
Tom Poor Bear started fighting the white man, and the white man’s friends started beating up Tom Poor Bear. But, with a sizeable group of Native American men at the motel, Tom Poor Bear had reinforcements, as several other AIM supporters rushed out of the motel to help him, as soon as they realized what was happening. They beat up the white men until the latter either fled or collapsed.
The AIM activists jumped to Barbara’s defense, which shows how many Native American men are protective of Native American women when white people harass them. Their action also shows that they prioritized fighting over passivity—they preferred to brawl rather than let the white men walk away without consequences for their racism and misogyny.
Themes
Shortly afterward, several squad cars pulled into the parking lot of the motel and, using a loudspeaker, they ordered the Native Americans within the motel to exit, as they were being charged with assault and battery. Aware that their lives were on the line—the police have a reputation for carelessly firing at Native Americans—one of the AIM members phoned one of the trial’s lawyers who was staying in another room in the motel. The lawyer then called the sheriff and eventually persuaded him to drop the charges.
Again, the U.S. government sided with the white men, as officials tried to arrest the Native American men instead of the white men who harassed Barbara. This incident reveals how Native American women have many reasons to distrust the U.S. government and not bring their cases forward: historically, the government often protects white perpetrators and punishes Native Americans for retaliating to the abuses of others.
Themes
In retrospect, Mary isn’t sure whether her days of traveling left a positive or negative effect on her life. Nonetheless, they gave her a broader idea of “what being an Indian within a white world meant.” And when she joined AIM, the aimlessness that plagued her disappeared.
Mary doesn’t appear to regret her roaming days, as they gave her a broader understanding of the racism—and misogyny—of white society. Joining AIM, an organized civil rights movement, allowed her to apply her small acts of resistance to a political environment.
Themes
