Radha Character Analysis

I licked the sweat off my upper lip. Had any of the household servants seen anything? Who knew what damage they could cause! My hands trembled as I grabbed a fistful of turquoise powder to fill the interior.

What could Radha have been thinking? We could so easily be replaced, but Sheela would always be the princess of this kingdom. I'd never had to teach Malik that; he understood the nuances of class and caste instinctively. He would never have compromised us.

In India, individual shame did not exist. Humiliation spread, as easily as oil on wax paper, to the entire family, even to distant cousins, uncles, aunts, nieces and nephews. The rumor mongers made sure of that. Blame lay heavily in my chest. Had I not deserted my marriage, Radha would not have suffered so much, and Maa and Pitaji would not have been so powerless against an entire village. Today, when she saw how unfairly Malik was being cast off, she reacted as she always had—like a defenseless animal. She knew no better because no one had taught her any better.

She dropped to her knees in front of me. “Jiji. Please don't send me back. I have no one else. I won't do it again. I won't. I promise.” Her thin body was shaking.

Embarrassed and ashamed, I helped her to standing and wiped her tears. I wanted to say, Why do you think I would send you back? You're my sister. My responsibility. But all that came out was, “I promise I'll do better, too.”

“You're my sister, Radha, but I don't know you that well—”

“Ask me anything! I'll tell you. Anything! You've never asked me the month I was born. October. What's my favorite food? Gajar ka halwa. I love sari that have mirrors sewn into them. And I love kajal on babies. My favorite color is the green of mango leaves. And I like the taste of guavas just before they're ripe, when the flesh is hard enough to make my mouth water.”

She was right, and it stung. I hadn't tried to get to know her. Not really. To be close to her made me feel my guilt more acutely, and I hadn't wanted that. I didn't want to be reminded of the terror she must have felt with a father who was defeated—or worse, a drunk—and a mother who seemed either resentful or indifferent. My sister had grown up alone in Ajar because of my transgression. Since her arrival in Jaipur, I'd buried myself in work, my steadfast companion. I was good at my work; it welcomed me, and I shined in its embrace. Radha, who was smart but naive, courageous but foolhardy, helpful but thoughtless, was far less manageable.

Hari chuckled, a sound without joy. “Now that you’re working for the palace, you're too good to help her yourself?”

I felt my face grow warm. For a decade, I had been healing the rich, only, for their minor, more emotional troubles. If I'd stayed with Hari, no doubt Saasuji would have gotten around to teaching me the more complex procedures only she practiced. I shivered as I imagined my mother-in-law regarding me with as much dismay as Hari was now.

He knew he'd touched a tender spot. “Even Radha travels in such fine circles now.” Before I could ask him what he meant, he said, “How much did the palace bursar give you?”

I shook my head. “You think it's that easy? This house took thirteen years of hard work and Yes, Ji and No, Ji and Whatever you say, Ji. You'll never have to do that if you go to that school. You have many years in which to have a child, after you finish school. […] You can be something better than a henna artist. Better than me. You can have a meaningful life.” The water was almost boiling. “Just—please help me find the cotton root bark.”

Her voice trembled. “He said I was just another cheap pair of hands to you. Your business only took off after I arrived. You told me yourself you booked more appointments now because of my henna. If that's true, then why can't you trust me to think for myself? […] It doesn't matter how hard I work, how much I do. You'll never have faith in me!”

“You're just saying things to hurt me. You always do. Just like you never wanted me to find you. Never wanted me to live with you.” [Radha] turned her red rimmed eyes toward Kanta. “That's why I want a family, Auntie! She's not my family. Not really. Not in the way that counts! You and uncle are more of a family to me than she is!”

Her words felt like a hammer blow. Kanta looked at me sympathetically.

No one said anything for a while. Finally, Kanta released a long sigh and stood. She went to sit on the arm of Radha’s chair and lifted her chin with two fingers. “Listen to Lakshmi. She is your jiji. She has done everything she can to make sure you have a good future—the best. You cannot talk to her like that. Not in my house.”

“She never spends time with me. All she does is work!”

Each of Radha 's accusations felt like a slap on my cheek.

“She has to support herself.” Kanta took Radha’s hand in hers. “And you. And Malik. She's brave, and she's very fierce. You two are a lot alike, you know.”

Alike? I never thought Radha and I shared anything but the watercolors of our eyes.

“I'm lucky, Radha,” Kanta continued, “I've never had to support myself. Never had to worry about money. Even now my father helps us out when Manu’s civil salary falls short of our expenses. My situation is very different from yours.” She sighed. “As much as I would like it to be different for you, it's not. You must think about money—how to pay rent, how to afford a new pair of shoes, food. As your sister has always done. I accept responsibility for what I've done, Radha. Your sister's not to blame. And neither are you.”

“You’re the one who let it happen.” He frowned. “She’s your sister.”

“And your son? Who’s responsible for him?”

He turned away, studied the carpet, smoked. “Can’t you get rid of it? I mean, isn’t that what we pay you for? To take care of this kind of thing?”

[…] Of course, I’d already suggested terminating the pregnancy. But coming from Samir, it sounded heartless. Is this how I’d sounded to my sister?

I looked down at my hands, rubbed them together. “I offered her my sachets, but she said no. She thinks Ravi is going to marry her.

“Rubbish! He knows better than that.”

“Does he?” I frowned at him. “As is the king so are his subjects.” As soon as I said the proverb, I knew it was true. There had been servant girls in Samir’s past, too.

Parvati! I'd served her. Pampered her. Fawned over her. I had handled Radha’s pregnancy as delicately as possible for the benefit of her family and mine. I hadn't created a scene. I hadn't demanded money. After all that, she was telling lies about me? In retaliation for my sister’s—and Ravi’s, don't forget!—folly! Her son was as much to blame—more, since he was older. But Parvati was taking it out on me.

It was so unfair! I tried to hold back my tears, but I failed. I've worked so hard, I wanted to tell Mrs. Sharma. I followed their rules. Swallowed their insults. Ignored their slights. Dodged their husbands’ wandering hands. Haven't I been punished enough?

How could I not manage one sentence that would help my sister understand that everything I did was for her own good? She exasperated me and sometimes intimidated me, but I would do anything to make her life better, easier[…]

I'd seen what Radha hadn’t: desperate women begging my saas to rid them of their burdens. Where she saw joy, I saw hardship. Where she saw love, I saw responsibility, obligation. Could they be two sides of the same coin? Had I experienced both love and duty, delight and exasperation, since she entered my life?

“The gossip-eaters were right. I'll always be the Bad Luck Girl.”

I pulled my head back to look at her. I lifted her chin. “No, Radha, you won't. You never were. You never will be. I'm sorry I ever said that of you. You've brought so much good luck into my life, into our lives. If it hadn't been for you, do you think I'd be going to Shimla? Building my own healing garden? Working with Dr. Kumar? How would I have done any of that without you?”[…]

“And look how you've helped me create a family. Malik. Kanta and Manu. And Nikhil. And, of course, you. You, Radha, Krishna’s wise gopi.”

What a miracle that she had found me, and I, her.

“So, Rundo Rani, burri sayani…are you coming to Shimla with us?”

I licked the sweat off my upper lip. Had any of the household servants seen anything? Who knew what damage they could cause! My hands trembled as I grabbed a fistful of turquoise powder to fill the interior.

What could Radha have been thinking? We could so easily be replaced, but Sheela would always be the princess of this kingdom. I'd never had to teach Malik that; he understood the nuances of class and caste instinctively. He would never have compromised us.

In India, individual shame did not exist. Humiliation spread, as easily as oil on wax paper, to the entire family, even to distant cousins, uncles, aunts, nieces and nephews. The rumor mongers made sure of that. Blame lay heavily in my chest. Had I not deserted my marriage, Radha would not have suffered so much, and Maa and Pitaji would not have been so powerless against an entire village. Today, when she saw how unfairly Malik was being cast off, she reacted as she always had—like a defenseless animal. She knew no better because no one had taught her any better.

She dropped to her knees in front of me. “Jiji. Please don't send me back. I have no one else. I won't do it again. I won't. I promise.” Her thin body was shaking.

Embarrassed and ashamed, I helped her to standing and wiped her tears. I wanted to say, Why do you think I would send you back? You're my sister. My responsibility. But all that came out was, “I promise I'll do better, too.”

“You're my sister, Radha, but I don't know you that well—”

“Ask me anything! I'll tell you. Anything! You've never asked me the month I was born. October. What's my favorite food? Gajar ka halwa. I love sari that have mirrors sewn into them. And I love kajal on babies. My favorite color is the green of mango leaves. And I like the taste of guavas just before they're ripe, when the flesh is hard enough to make my mouth water.”

She was right, and it stung. I hadn't tried to get to know her. Not really. To be close to her made me feel my guilt more acutely, and I hadn't wanted that. I didn't want to be reminded of the terror she must have felt with a father who was defeated—or worse, a drunk—and a mother who seemed either resentful or indifferent. My sister had grown up alone in Ajar because of my transgression. Since her arrival in Jaipur, I'd buried myself in work, my steadfast companion. I was good at my work; it welcomed me, and I shined in its embrace. Radha, who was smart but naive, courageous but foolhardy, helpful but thoughtless, was far less manageable.

Hari chuckled, a sound without joy. “Now that you’re working for the palace, you're too good to help her yourself?”

I felt my face grow warm. For a decade, I had been healing the rich, only, for their minor, more emotional troubles. If I'd stayed with Hari, no doubt Saasuji would have gotten around to teaching me the more complex procedures only she practiced. I shivered as I imagined my mother-in-law regarding me with as much dismay as Hari was now.

He knew he'd touched a tender spot. “Even Radha travels in such fine circles now.” Before I could ask him what he meant, he said, “How much did the palace bursar give you?”

I shook my head. “You think it's that easy? This house took thirteen years of hard work and Yes, Ji and No, Ji and Whatever you say, Ji. You'll never have to do that if you go to that school. You have many years in which to have a child, after you finish school. […] You can be something better than a henna artist. Better than me. You can have a meaningful life.” The water was almost boiling. “Just—please help me find the cotton root bark.”

Her voice trembled. “He said I was just another cheap pair of hands to you. Your business only took off after I arrived. You told me yourself you booked more appointments now because of my henna. If that's true, then why can't you trust me to think for myself? […] It doesn't matter how hard I work, how much I do. You'll never have faith in me!”

“You're just saying things to hurt me. You always do. Just like you never wanted me to find you. Never wanted me to live with you.” [Radha] turned her red rimmed eyes toward Kanta. “That's why I want a family, Auntie! She's not my family. Not really. Not in the way that counts! You and uncle are more of a family to me than she is!”

Her words felt like a hammer blow. Kanta looked at me sympathetically.

No one said anything for a while. Finally, Kanta released a long sigh and stood. She went to sit on the arm of Radha’s chair and lifted her chin with two fingers. “Listen to Lakshmi. She is your jiji. She has done everything she can to make sure you have a good future—the best. You cannot talk to her like that. Not in my house.”

“She never spends time with me. All she does is work!”

Each of Radha 's accusations felt like a slap on my cheek.

“She has to support herself.” Kanta took Radha’s hand in hers. “And you. And Malik. She's brave, and she's very fierce. You two are a lot alike, you know.”

Alike? I never thought Radha and I shared anything but the watercolors of our eyes.

“I'm lucky, Radha,” Kanta continued, “I've never had to support myself. Never had to worry about money. Even now my father helps us out when Manu’s civil salary falls short of our expenses. My situation is very different from yours.” She sighed. “As much as I would like it to be different for you, it's not. You must think about money—how to pay rent, how to afford a new pair of shoes, food. As your sister has always done. I accept responsibility for what I've done, Radha. Your sister's not to blame. And neither are you.”

“You’re the one who let it happen.” He frowned. “She’s your sister.”

“And your son? Who’s responsible for him?”

He turned away, studied the carpet, smoked. “Can’t you get rid of it? I mean, isn’t that what we pay you for? To take care of this kind of thing?”

[…] Of course, I’d already suggested terminating the pregnancy. But coming from Samir, it sounded heartless. Is this how I’d sounded to my sister?

I looked down at my hands, rubbed them together. “I offered her my sachets, but she said no. She thinks Ravi is going to marry her.

“Rubbish! He knows better than that.”

“Does he?” I frowned at him. “As is the king so are his subjects.” As soon as I said the proverb, I knew it was true. There had been servant girls in Samir’s past, too.

Parvati! I'd served her. Pampered her. Fawned over her. I had handled Radha’s pregnancy as delicately as possible for the benefit of her family and mine. I hadn't created a scene. I hadn't demanded money. After all that, she was telling lies about me? In retaliation for my sister’s—and Ravi’s, don't forget!—folly! Her son was as much to blame—more, since he was older. But Parvati was taking it out on me.

It was so unfair! I tried to hold back my tears, but I failed. I've worked so hard, I wanted to tell Mrs. Sharma. I followed their rules. Swallowed their insults. Ignored their slights. Dodged their husbands’ wandering hands. Haven't I been punished enough?

How could I not manage one sentence that would help my sister understand that everything I did was for her own good? She exasperated me and sometimes intimidated me, but I would do anything to make her life better, easier[…]

I'd seen what Radha hadn’t: desperate women begging my saas to rid them of their burdens. Where she saw joy, I saw hardship. Where she saw love, I saw responsibility, obligation. Could they be two sides of the same coin? Had I experienced both love and duty, delight and exasperation, since she entered my life?

“The gossip-eaters were right. I'll always be the Bad Luck Girl.”

I pulled my head back to look at her. I lifted her chin. “No, Radha, you won't. You never were. You never will be. I'm sorry I ever said that of you. You've brought so much good luck into my life, into our lives. If it hadn't been for you, do you think I'd be going to Shimla? Building my own healing garden? Working with Dr. Kumar? How would I have done any of that without you?”[…]

“And look how you've helped me create a family. Malik. Kanta and Manu. And Nikhil. And, of course, you. You, Radha, Krishna’s wise gopi.”

What a miracle that she had found me, and I, her.

“So, Rundo Rani, burri sayani…are you coming to Shimla with us?”