About a Boy

by

Nick Hornby

About a Boy: Chapter 11 Summary & Analysis

Summary
Analysis
When Marcus comes home the next day, he discovers his mum’s suicide note on the kitchen table, overlooked in the previous night’s madness. In the note, she expresses her remorse and the unwavering love she has for her son, hoping he will someday understand why she acted in such a seemingly “stupid, selfish, [and] unkind” way. She explains that her illness, her depression, “doesn’t listen to anything or anybody else” anymore; she no longer feels in control of her actions or outlook. She writes that she will always look out for Marcus from the other side, believing that a mum is allowed to do so when something bad happens to her, even if the bad thing is ultimately “her fault.”
In her note, which expresses remorse and love, Fiona attempts to explain her actions as a consequence of her unyielding depression, which she describes as an overpowering force that overrides reason and control. Even her love for her son is not reason enough for her to want to stay alive, a revelation that she understands her 12-year-old will likely have a difficult time reconciling. Fiona’s assertion that she will continue to watch over Marcus from the other side seems more like an attempt to provide him with a modicum of comfort during an incredibly painful time than it does her sincere belief. This letter—which Fiona never expected she would discuss with the son she’d intended to leave behind—forces Marcus to confront the ugliest parts of his mother’s mental illness, fundamentally changing his perception of their relationship and her actions.
Themes
Coming of Age and Maturity Theme Icon
Alienation and Mental Illness Theme Icon
Quotes
Fiona and Suzie return home from the hospital to find Marcus still sitting at the kitchen table, processing his mother’s suicide note, and Suzie leaves to give them privacy to speak. Marcus expresses his anger, and Fiona is understanding. She tells him she feels much better after her hospital stay, but they need to “look after each other” going forward. Marcus agrees outwardly but feels internally that, for the very first time, his mother has given him a reason not to trust her. He understands she feels better right now, but he anticipates that things will inevitably change, and she’ll fall back into her old depressive patterns.
Fiona’s understanding of Marcus’s anger demonstrates her awareness of the impact her actions have had on him. Her reassurance that she feels better after her stay in the hospital and her call for mutual care going forward indicate her commitment to forming a more honest relationship with her son, who she feels is now mature enough to understand that sometimes parents need help, too. However, Marcus no longer trusts his mother like he did before the incident; he’s afraid that she could relapse, and what would he do then? This scene illustrates the fragile balance between hope and skepticism in their relationship, with Marcus’s newfound distrust serving as a protective mechanism against the unpredictable future.
Themes
Coming of Age and Maturity Theme Icon
Alienation and Mental Illness Theme Icon
At the newsagent’s, Marcus tries to pick out a movie for him and his mum to watch later that evening. He puts a lot of thought into his choice, trying to avoid any movie involving death—which, he realizes, is almost all of them. Eventually, he lands on Groundhog Day. Although he’s never seen it, the back of the box advertises it as a new release and a funny film, so he feels good about his decision. Midway through the movie, however, it suddenly takes a turn and becomes “all about suicide.” This both angers and embarrasses Marcus, who believes a warning should have been included on the box to prevent viewers like him, who are trying to avoid the subject of death, from accidentally renting a movie in which the protagonist repeatedly tries to take his life for comedic effect.
Hoping for a normal, enjoyable movie night with his mum, Marcus carefully selects Groundhog Day because of its advertised lightheartedness. Marcus takes his mother’s call to watch out for one another seriously, so his inability to “protect” her from the film’s unexpected focus on suicide makes him feel like he’s failed her in some way. If he can’t even protect her from a silly movie, how can he expect to protect her from real life? Already, Marcus is beginning to feel the weight of the expectations placed upon him as a result of his mother’s suicide attempt, pointing to the untenability of this new dynamic.
Themes
Coming of Age and Maturity Theme Icon
Alienation and Mental Illness Theme Icon
Identity, Pop Culture, and Fitting In Theme Icon
Prompted by the irrational fear of his mother viewing these “suicide” scenes and subsequently being influenced to attempt it again, Marcus suddenly turns off the movie. When his mum asks him to turn it back on, he does his best to dissuade her, but she persists. Ultimately, Marcus is forced to tell her why he turned it off: the main character “spent the last five minutes trying to kill himself.” Fiona is taken aback; she hadn’t even noticed the connection. This only upsets Marcus more, as he feels he no longer understands his mum at all. He defeatedly turns the movie back on, and Fiona expresses that she’s glad; she’s looking forward to seeing “how it turns out.”
Marcus’s decision to turn off the movie to prevent his mother from being impacted by its suicide scenes further demonstrates his heightened anxiety and sense of responsibility for her wellbeing. Fiona’s obliviousness to the film’s darker themes and her subsequent request to continue watching it exacerbate Marcus’s anxiety, as he dreads having to explain the real reason why he turned off the television. His forced explanation of the film’s content and Fiona’s lack of initial recognition of its impact deepen Marcus’s feelings of isolation and frustration, highlighting the new strain on their relationship. Fiona’s casual interest in the movie’s resolution provides a contrast to Marcus’s intense concern and illustrates their differing coping mechanisms. Her desire to see “how it turns out” is both a testament to her resiliency and a sign that there are still parts of her life that are worth seeing through to the end.
Themes
Coming of Age and Maturity Theme Icon
Alienation and Mental Illness Theme Icon
Identity, Pop Culture, and Fitting In Theme Icon
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