Dibs in Search of Self

by

Virginia Axline

Dibs in Search of Self: Chapter 1 Summary & Analysis

Summary
Analysis
Every day at school, when it is time for Dibs and his classmates to go home for lunch, Dibs throws a temper tantrum and refuses to leave. He crouches in a corner, and when his teachers, Miss Jane and Hedda,  try to coax him to put on his hat and coat, he shouts and hits them. Sometimes Dibs stops fighting and simply cries as he goes with his mother. Other times, if he refuses to stop screaming, his mother sends in her chauffeur, who scoops up Dibs indifferently and carries him to the car.
Axline establishes a connection between Dibs’s unempathetic home life and his inability to express and conduct himself properly. When his mother picks him up and ignores his cries, or when she sends in a chauffeur who is indifferent to his emotions, Dibs doesn’t feel understood. Consequently, he withdraws from other people and acts out, unable to express or handle his feelings appropriately.
Themes
Therapy, Empathy, and Non-Judgment Theme Icon
Dibs has attended this private school for two years. When he arrives each morning, he stands inside the door and whimpers until someone leads him in. Dibs doesn’t talk or interact with the other children; he crawls around the edge of the room and hides from the others, rocking himself and sucking his thumb or lying rigid on the floor. Sometimes his teachers think that he might be mentally disabled, but other times, they believe that he might be very intelligent. Hedda says that Dibs even seems to know how to read. If the teachers try to force him to do anything, however, he throws a tantrum. Still, they get the impression that he is listening to their activities, though they’re never sure.
Dibs’s teachers’ account describes the conflict between Dibs’s intellect and his social skills. Dibs is unable to cope with his emotions or socialize, to the point that he reverts to infantile behaviors rather than verbally communicating. Even if Dibs is highly intelligent, as his teachers suspect, he isn’t able to properly use his intelligence or express it. This demonstrates how all aspects of development—intellectual, emotional, and social—are necessary for a happy, well-rounded child.
Themes
Intelligence vs. Emotional and Social Skills Theme Icon
Quotes
The school psychologist and pediatrician tried to test Dibs once, but Dibs was wary of both of them. The school—a very exclusive institution on the Upper East Side of New York City—prides itself on having bright, sociable students. Dibs’s mother used her influence with the board of trustees to get him in. Any time the teachers suggest that Dibs needs professional help, his mother insists that they give him more time. The teachers are constantly baffled by the five-year-old, wondering if he is autistic or simply unhappy.
Dibs’s wariness of the school psychologist and pediatrician indicate that he has trust issues. It seems that Dibs distrusts any new person or experience in his life—and given the fact that changes and new situations are inevitable, this means that Dibs rarely feels safe. Dibs’s mother’s response to his teachers also hints at her own fear of judgment, as she worries about not having a “normal” child.
Themes
Therapy, Empathy, and Non-Judgment Theme Icon
Trust and Security Theme Icon
Dibs’s father is a well-known scientist, but none of the teachers have met him. Dibs also has a younger sister named Dorothy, whom his mother claims is a “perfect child.” The school staff have finally decided to do something about Dibs’s behavior, so they invite Axline to observe Dibs before they make a decision about expelling him. Axline is a clinical psychologist who has experience working with both children and parents.
The way Dibs’s parents compare him to his “perfect” sister Dorothy introduces the troubled dynamic in their home life. Dibs clearly doesn’t live up to his parents’ expectations and standards, which contributes to his unhappiness, as he feels like they’re constantly evaluating him and finding him lacking. They do not allow him to develop at his own pace or simply be himself.
Themes
Parental Expectations vs. Self-Determination Theme Icon
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Dibs’s mother agrees to meet with Axline—Axline has already heard from the teachers that Dibs’s mother is difficult and cold. She and Dibs’s father accept that Dibs is probably mentally disabled, but Hedda says that Dibs’s parents only think this because they don’t want to admit that they’ve emotionally deprived him. Miss Jane explains that she and Hedda care about Dibs and are frustrated with his parents, which strikes Axline as respectful and compassionate. She decides to meet Dibs for a series of play therapy sessions—if his parents agree to the idea.
Hedda and Miss Jane understand that Dibs’s parents’ evaluations of him contribute to his lack of emotional intelligence and social skills. But their assessment also foreshadows the fact that his parents do harbor doubt over whether they caused his condition—and they also fear that others will judge them for their parenting. And indeed, Hedda and Miss Jane’s criticisms perhaps indicate that these anxieties are legitimate.
Themes
Therapy, Empathy, and Non-Judgment Theme Icon
Parental Expectations vs. Self-Determination Theme Icon