I Will Always Write Back is a story about how acts of kindness and generosity can change a life—in particular the lives of the authors, long-distance pen pals Caitlin Alifirenka and Martin Ganda. The kind deeds that Caitlin and Martin do for each other start small but escalate over the course of the book. Caitlin (who is American) begins their correspondence by doing research about Zimbabwe (where Martin is from), going above and beyond what her teacher requires her to do. For instance, as the two begin writing to each other more regularly, Martin makes sacrifices to please Caitlin, working to pay for stamps and getting an expensive photo taken of himself that he can send to her. These are both difficult tasks due to Martin’s family’s poverty and the unstable political situation in Zimbabwe, but exchanging letters and photos brings them closer together and serves as the foundation for what becomes a lifelong friendship.
As their friendship deepens, Caitlin realizes how difficult life is for Martin and his family. She feels guilty that her parents can afford to buy her a car and that she eats chicken on weeknights, whereas Martin’s family can barely afford to pay for a small shack to live in, and they only eat chicken on Christmas, if then. Caitlin decides to start sending over money that she’s earned through babysitting. This money, which is a relatively small sacrifice for Caitlin, changes Martin’s whole world, at one point even helping Martin’s mother survive malaria. By the end of the memoir, Caitlin has convinced others to extend kindness and generosity to Martin too—not just her whole family, but even people outside her family (like the staff at the U.S. embassy in Zimbabwe and the president of Villanova University), who all help fulfill Martin’s dream of studying at an American university. Martin repays this kindness by always writing back to Caitlin, no matter how difficult it is, and by doing his best in school so that he’ll one day get to meet her and thank her in person. Caitlin, Martin, and their co-author Liz Welch depict how small acts of kindness can have a big impact, laying the groundwork for larger acts of kindness later and even forming a basis for lifelong relationships. They show that while it may not be possible for individuals to solve large-scale problems like poverty and political instability, it is still possible for individuals to effect real change through kindness, and this kindness may end up being “contagious.”
Kindness and Generosity ThemeTracker
Kindness and Generosity Quotes in I Will Always Write Back
I’d never heard of Zimbabwe. But something about the way the name looked on the blackboard intrigued me. It was exotic, and difficult to pronounce.
When I unfolded the letter, a small snapshot fell onto my desk.
I could not believe my pen pal would send me something so precious. Photos are very rare and quite expensive in Zimbabwe.
The next evening, with a full belly, I wrote Caitlin a letter. I thanked her for the very generous dollar bill and told her I would send her something in return soon. I considered sending her a Zimbabwean dollar but knew that was one day’s worth of sadza. So instead, I made the only promise that I knew I could keep: that I would always write back, no matter what.
It was strange, because even though we had never met, Martin was the only person I felt I could be totally honest with. I never worried that he would judge or tease. On the contrary, I could tell Martin whatever was happening in my life, knowing he’d always take my side, no matter what.
A lesser man may have been threatened by Caitlin’s generosity. Here was a fourteen-year-old girl sending us more money than my father made in several months. My father only had love and respect for Caitlin. Her letters had always been precious to me. Now they were also crucial to my whole family. We were on a ship that was sinking, huddled at the tip before it went under. Caitlin’s gift was a lifeboat.
My mother was afraid to keep this much money in our house. It made us a target in these difficult times.
Reading that letter brought tears to my eyes. He was so proud. He had never asked me for help. Asking my parents for help was probably one of the hardest things for him to have to do. He did not want to burden me. He knew that I would get sick worrying about him in such need. But there it was, written on paper, a huge SOS. My parents knew I had a pen pal in Zimbabwe, but they did not know how close we had become. That evening, I decided to tell them everything. It was the only way I could truly help Martin.
And then, like magic, a letter arrived.
This one, however, had been ripped and taped back up in a crude way. Someone had written in capital letters INSPECTED FOR CONTRABAND across Caitlin’s beautiful penmanship. It felt like a violation.
Thanks to Caitlin, we ate chicken for Christmas that year, a miracle considering what our friends and neighbors were experiencing. In Zimbabwe, if you have food, you share it, so our neighbors ate chicken with us.
Thank you for your effort, love, and time. Thank you for the shoes you gave us. My mom, I repeat, is now counted as a human in society.
Hours later, a nurse confirmed it was malaria—thankfully not cerebral. She needed IV fluids immediately. She was so dehydrated that she was at risk of dying without them. But the hospital couldn’t afford to supply any medicine. Instead, the nurse told us what we needed, and then we had to secure it.
“There is a man outside wearing a blue shirt,” she said. “He sells IVs.”
I was surprised to receive a letter from Caitlin’s mom. In it she offered to help me navigate the complicated American college admission process. I was so happy to hear this. It was further proof that Caitlin was not the only angel in this family.
Anne asked me if I had ever heard of the SATs. I had, in fact, because my good friend Wallace had taken them earlier that year. He, too, was planning to go to school in the States that September.
The first line of the email was like rocket fuel:
We are pleased to offer you a full scholarship beginning with the 2003-2004 academic year.
It propelled me from my seat. The breath I’d been holding for the past few months came barreling out of my mouth as I shouted, “Yesssssss!”
I felt Caitlin squeeze my hand, and I squeezed back. After six years of imagining what it would be like to see her, to hug her, to hear her laugh, to hold her hand, here she was, my best friend from afar, now standing right next to me.
Watching him exchange vows with Caitlin earlier that day, I got a bit choked up. Caitlin and I had already shared so many milestones—and still have many ahead. I did not know then that I would go on to do my MBA at Duke, or that Caitlin would finish her nursing degree, as she had planned since she was sixteen or give birth to a beautiful baby girl. All I knew was that we both had witnessed so many of each other’s dreams come true.
I have no idea what any of these young people will do with the emotions our story stirred in each of them—but I am excited by the possibilities. It’s why I wanted to write this book.
Kindness is contagious. It changes lives. It changed mine. What will it do for you?